A Pink Moon Ritual to Balance the Heart

Happy Full Moon, loves! This evening, the Full Moon in Libra makes its ascent in the night sky, making this a perfect time to do ritual and meditative work related to balance, harmony, and relationships.

Nick-named the Pink Moon in the Old Farmer’s Almanac for its tendency to herald the blooming of early spring flowers (creeping phlox, which is pink in color), this moon is more likely to be a deep yellow or orange in color—but nevertheless spectacular to witness, and powerful for charging up your spiritual intentions.

There’s been some debate over whether or not this moon is also a Blue Moon (and some confusion from those who don’t understand how a thing could possible be pink and blue simultaneously). Patheos has an extremely detailed article on the various definitions of a Blue Moon, but according to Heron, who authored the piece, tonight’s Full Moon on April 19th 2019 does count, if you follow the 2019 Lunar Calendar, rather than the Gregorian Calendar. Essentially, a Blue Moon is the 13th/bonus Full Moon in a calendar year. That makes tonight’s moon Blue by the Lunar Calendar, but not by the Gregorian Calendar.

If you choose to acknowledge the significance of the Pink Moon in Libra as a Blue Moon also, it makes this lunar event particularly potent for workings related to justice, fairness, balance, & equality. This doesn’t have to involve matters of the heart (in fact, it’s also a good time for legal workings!) but with so much heavy relationship energy flying around these past few months (last month’s Mercury Rx, and the conjunction of Venus and Jupiter Rx this month causing a lot of deep, sometimes hurtful revelations) it’s the perfect time to ask yourself: what do I need from those closest to me, what am I able to give in return, who do I want to draw closer, and who must I let go?

THIS RITUAL IS NOT A LOVE SPELL

Are love spells possible? Absolutely. Are love spells ethical? Absolutely not. I get asked a lot whether I can make pouches, bags, or custom rituals to attract or retain a specific lover, and the simple answer is: yes, it’s possible. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t done it before, for clients and for myself. But time and experience have taught me that you don’t want that. There are ways to do such workings ethically, but a straight up spell to bring an ex back or force someone to come to you is tantamount to spiritual rape. I’m not about it.

Instead, this ritual is a two-parter designed to clarify what your heart needs to find balance and what you can offer others to aid in that balance. So often we forget that relationships—all relationships, romantic or otherwise—are give and take. They are delicate, and if they’re healthy relationships, they’re in a constant state of evolution and growth. The last few months may have swung your relationships with others way off course, causing the scales to swing violently in one direction or the other. The other person (or people) almost certainly had a hand in destabilizing the relationship—but it’s time to acknowledge that you did, too. But balancing your own heart and moving toward a place of deeper self-knowledge, you’ll be better placed to decide who to keep and who to move away from, and how to help those relationships that are worth saving grow in more beautiful, productive ways—just like the first flush of rosy phlox, the spring flower from which the Pink Moon derives its name.

DO I NEED A ROMANTIC PARTNER TO COMPLETE THIS RITUAL?

Absolutely not! The focus is on you, here: what you need, who you are, how you will move forward with a whole, balanced heart. While it’s perfect for folks who want to clarify or heal specific relationships, it’s also great for people who want to sure up their emotional/psychological/spiritual foundation in order to move through the rest of the year with a stronger, more open heart.

WHAT YOU NEED

As with all my rituals, any specific tools or props I mention here are absolutely substitutable. Don’t have a specific crystal? Clear quartz can almost always be substituted. Don’t have a glass bowl? Use your mom’s tupperware. There are, however, a few essentials:

A body of water. (Naturally the ocean, a river, or a lake are ideal. Don’t have that nearby? Use a bathtub. Or a sink. I’m serious.)
Fire of some kind. (Candles are easiest. Got a fire pit? Great! Think you can safely make a bonfire? Awesome.)
Dirt, soil, or sand. If you can gather it from somewhere special to you (a favorite park, for example) then great.
Incense, sage, or any other fragrant herb that burns and produces smoke.
A jar or container with a lid.
A piece of paper and a pen.

Since we’re doing balancing work, representing the elements is important. Image: via Joffi on Deviantart.

Optional Extras…

Bloodstone, Moonstone, Azurite, and/or Ameythyst
Hawthorne, Sandalwood, Cinnamon (sticks if possible), Lavender, and/or Rose Petals
A sigil or symbol that is meaningful to/represents you. This can be something you channel through meditation, something you’ve been working with for a while, or simply an image or picture that represents you. Even a photograph will do (as long as it’s one where you feel most like yourself).

WHAT TO DO

Wait till evening, as it begins to get dark. Prepare your elemental props: you source of fire, water, air (smoke), and earth. You want all these elements close together, so if you’re working outside be sure that you have your fire set up nearby your source of water, that you have sage or incense handy, etc.

Print or create two copies of the image that represents you/your heart (if you’re using one). Prep your jar/container by taping or gluing one of these images to the bottom of the jar on the outside, and one on the inside bottom of the jar. These images represent your internal and external self—the parts of your heart we’ll be balancing.

Meditate for a while on the deepest question you hope to receive clarity on during this Full Moon—the biggest injustice, or heartache, or source of imbalance. If this pertains to a specific relationship (or relationships), that’s fine! But it’s even better if you can trace the source of unease back to yourself. Maybe the question is “What do I want?” or “What do I need?” Maybe it’s "Who am I?” Whatever you settle on, write the question down on the piece of paper.

As night settles in, begin charging your question within each of the four elements. First, smooth it into the dirt/sand/earth and hold your right palm over it. Focus your energy on that spot, on the fact of the land as a source of grounding. Think of how we come from the land, how the most essential parts of you originated in soil and will ultimately return there. Draw the land into your question. Remove the paper from the dirt, and move on…

Next, place the paper over your source of smoke (incense or sage are perfect, as the smoke is usually visible) and watch the currents of air eddy and twirl around it. Consider how important it is for your heart—the part of yourself that powers your body—to receive oxygen to survive. Ask the air to carry your question to wherever it must go to receive a deep, true answer.

Finally, prepare to ask the final two elements (fire and water) to answer your question. How you do this will really depend on your sources. If you’re using a smaller, contained flame (like a candle or cauldron—something where collecting the ashes will be easy), I recommend doing this first. Take your paper, fold it, and place it into the flame. As it burns, consider what it means to be ‘aflame’ - to feel deep, profound passion in your heart, to know that at your core you have an irreducible spark, a secret part of you that is unique and solely and completely yours, regardless of your relationships or to whom you are connected. Ask the flame to purify that part of you, to answer your question by burning away self-deception, confusion, and artifice.

If you’re working with a larger flame (like a fire pit or bonfire), you’re going to want to submerge your paper in water first. The gift of water is its flexibility, its depth, and it’s ability to connect you to others (pools meet streams meet rivers meet the ocean, etc.) As you hold your paper in the water, focus on how your question ties you to and relates to others. What parts of your heart require connectivity to balance, and what might that connectivity ideally look like? If you’re focusing this ritual on a specific relationship, the water element is where your connection to this person should be most keenly focused on.

Depending on your order of operations, you’ll now either take half the ashes from your burned paper and let them drift in the water (focusing on the meditation offered in the paragraph above), OR you’ll take your damp paper and consign it to the flames. A large enough blaze shouldn’t struggle to burn up wet paper.

Your next step is to extinguish the flame. If you’re using a bigger fire, you may want to sit beside it and absorb some of that sweet lunar energy, or (if it’s safe) wait until the fire dies down naturally to complete the final phase of the ritual. If not, extinguish the fire safely, preferably without dousing it with water.

You’ll recall I asked you to save half the ashes from your question paper. If you put the paper in the flames last, see if you can collect some ashes after the fire is extinguished. Take those remaining ashes and place them into your jar, along with any crystals and herbs you elected to use. Run the burning sage or incense stick around the inside of the jar to trap the element of air. Your herbs will suffice for the earth element, but if you wish you might also pick some grass or nearby weeds/flowers to use (I don’t recommend using soil, but it’s up to you). The ashes you’ve placed inside are fire. Finally, take some water gathered under moonlight (ideally from a natural water source, but if not, take a little bowl of tap water outside and let it soak up the lunar energy first) and place that in the jar too. Screw the lid on tight.

This jar is now an external manifestation of the deepest questions of your heart. Keep it somewhere private but close to you: an altar, a bedside cabinet, a special place in your closet. It’s important that nobody else interferes with it over the next lunar cycle.

This spell will very likely take a full moon cycle to ‘respond,’ but you can look for answers to the question you asked in dreams, in surprising interactions, in conversations with your friends and loved ones. Pay attention: the universe rarely answers us in flashy ways. But ideally you’ll begin to feel more internally balanced in the days following the execution of the spell. If you need a recharge, take out your jar and sit with it. Contemplate the question/s you asked, keep a journal of anything that comes up—any self discoveries or synchronicities.

This moon provides a powerful opportunity to know yourself better, to understand who can help you on your path to growth and healing, and how your heart—as part of a network of hearts and spirits—requires nourishment to blossom. Focus on what nourishes you—what meets a true need, not a projection. You are not a void. You are not a bottomless pit. You can be balanced: you just need to remember yourself as the source, not the symptom.